


Drowning in you (your voice, your eyes)

by luminism



Category: LOONA (Korea Band)
Genre: Alternate Universe - Merpeople, Alternate Universe - Not K-Pop Idols, Ambiguous/Open Ending, F/F, Heartbreak, Inspired by Poetry, Inspired by Siren's Lament, Inspired by Webtoon, Not Beta Read, POV Multiple
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-17
Packaged: 2021-03-16 22:35:15
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,392
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28963995
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luminism/pseuds/luminism
Summary: Haseul swims in the lonely sea day and night, searching for a chance to be human again. All she has to do is find a heartbroken human, sing to them, and transfer the siren's curse with a kiss. It's a lot harder than it sounds, but one day luck comes her way in the form of a beautiful pink-haired girl.Vivi works at the bowling alley, a painful reminder of the girl she once loved, the girl who once loved her. She goes to the seashore after work sometimes to feel the sea air on her face and forget about her broken heart (usually she ends up just thinking about her more). Vivi didn't expect to find an easy way to forget everything.*The siren's curse and siren's song used are from Siren's Lament on Webtoon by Instantmiso! I really liked the way she set up the siren lore in the comic, so go check it out!*
Relationships: Jo Haseul/Viian Wong | ViVi, Past Ha Sooyoung | Yves/Viian Wong | Vivi
Comments: 4
Kudos: 16





	Drowning in you (your voice, your eyes)

**Author's Note:**

  * Inspired by [Siren's Lament](https://archiveofourown.org/external_works/761874) by Instantmiso. 



> As I mentioned in the summary, I got the siren lore from Siren's Lament by Instantmiso. You should go read it if you haven't already, find it on Webtoon! If you don't know how the siren lore works in the comic, basically all sirens were once humans that had broken hearts. Sirens have the ability to see broken hearts and lure humans in, then kiss them and transfer the curse. The curse and transformation are meant to be a promise of a second chance at life, so people forget all their memories when they become a siren. The concept of sirens that I use in this as well as the song are not my original idea so please don't think I'm trying to take credit for Instantmiso's idea, this fic is just a product of me rereading Siren's Lament and reading Siren Song by Margaret Atwood in my English class. Please accept my only offering for femslash February, I hope you enjoy!

Haseul doesn't know how long she has been a siren. It's all she knows, swimming, wandering, waiting. Drifting aimlessly through night and day. Loneliness. 

Haseul just knows that she is a siren, and the way to do something, be someone, _feel_ something again is to find a broken hearted human and kiss them. Haseul's name isn't even Haseul, not really. Just a name that she stumbled upon putting together strings of letters until something clicked, temporarily, for a sense of identity in this sea of nobodies. 

Sometimes she wonders what her life was like before and how bad it must have been for her to have agreed to throw it away. Did she have a lover? Siblings? What about parents, were they asking around and anxiously waiting for news of their daughter? But Haseul doesn't know any of these things, so she figures it's best not to dwell on the past and instead focus on waiting. 

Waiting for a chance to rise out of the seafoam as somebody. 

🌊

Vivi sighs, leaning over the counter at the shoe desk. The bowling alley had long since cleared out, leaving Vivi free to stare out the window rather than worry about doing her job and helping customers. 

She really should quit working at this place. The neon lights and retro aesthetic of the bowling alley don't make her feel any better, especially not paired with the fake smile she keeps on her face when helping patrons get shoes. Everything about this place just reminds Vivi of her: of meeting her, laughing at her jokes, and the most painful of all, kissing her. 

A quick glance at the clock has Vivi pushing away from the counter and towards the employee's lounge. The bowling alley is about to close and, once again, Vivi is left with the responsibility of locking up, Yerim and their other coworkers having left already. She doesn't really mind, it gives her time to think and play her music as loud as she wants. But she would be lying if she said it doesn't feel at least a little lonely to be locking up a bowling alley by herself on a Friday night. 

It's a nice night for a walk by the seashore. 

🌊

Haseul swims in circles, thinking about what she'll do when she is human. She no longer thinks of what her life before may have meant. She was given this chance for a reason; her life before clearly sucked. She swims forward and up, towards the future. 

There it is, up above on the shore. A distinct blue glow, bright and calling to her. Almost waiting for her response. She should respond with a song, it's only the right thing for her to do. 

_O broken hearted one, your soul has grown weary. Have you turned to the rippling tides to engulf your lonely tears?_

And when Haseul finishes her song, she will be rising up and forward, reborn. 

🌊

It's a chilly night, normal given the season. Vivi doesn't mind the chill too much, she's fine with walking by the sea in this weather. She won't admit that she finds it fitting for her mood, for the sake of not sounding melodramatic. 

The ocean reminds her of her old love, and what could have been. The ocean hurts her, but draws her in all the same like an alluring song meant just for her, to whisper all of its secrets in her ear. The ocean reminds her of Sooyoung, of how she drew Vivi in and then let her go. 

She had been working at the skating rink next door for about a year when she decided to switch to the bowling alley. The two were actually owned by the same people; one could tell by the similar retro vibes and neon lights, though the skating rink had a softer and lighter aesthetic than the bowling alley. 

And it was after making the switch that Vivi first saw her. 

It was early September, a few days into working at the bowling alley when she had walked in. A short white dress with flowing sleeves to contrast her long, dark hair. She wasn't much taller than Vivi, but carried herself with such grace and confidence that Vivi was drawn to her instantly. Add her lips stained red with lip tint and she had to have been the most beautiful woman Vivi had ever laid eyes on. 

"Can I please get some shoes?" Vivi snapped back into reality to find the stranger waiting patiently, a small smile on her face. The rest of the interaction was a bit of a blur, Vivi barely able to focus on her job when there was a literal goddess standing in front of her. 

The goddess got her shoes and, with another smile, walked away towards a bowling lane that already had a crowd of other girls. Vivi's eyes followed her the entire way, and even while the other was bowling, she couldn't stop staring.

When she and her friends had finally finished bowling, the beautiful girl brought her shoes back with a small slip of paper. Before Vivi could say anything, she was gone, her hair bouncing as she walked out of the door. 

In pretty, curly handwriting, the paper read _Sooyoung, 011-028-2017_ _♥_ _._ Vivi stared at the paper, resisting the urge to start screaming in the middle of the bowling alley. She called Sooyoung later that night, and they went to the skating rink two days later. 

Dating Sooyoung was a whirlwind and a dance, fast-moving and always a new adventure. She left Vivi breathless trying to keep up and dizzy from her bold actions. She left Vivi uncertain, having never defined their relationship, but kept Vivi on her toes with her laughter and her touch. 

And kissing her, god, _kissing her._ Kissing Sooyoung felt like being in the garden of Eden, like being in paradise. But kissing Sooyoung also felt forbidden, like the fruit of knowledge, and Vivi knew deep down that she was bound to get thrown out of paradise eventually. 

She just wasn't expecting it to be only a couple months later. 

In early December, Sooyoung's texts became sparse. They didn't go on as many dates, and when they did, Sooyoung felt more distant. Yerim noticed that Sooyoung didn't come by the bowling alley as often and tried to cheer Vivi up by being extra Yerim-y. (That is to say, bright and happy)

Vivi had figured it was over and decided to move on, no longer waiting for glimpses of long, dark hair in the bowling alley or getting her hopes up when her phone buzzed. Her heart didn't necessarily comply, but that was something that would fade with time. 

She was mostly over Sooyoung when she had been walking down the street and heard a familiar laugh that set her heart racing. She looked around until there, on the other side of the street outside the cafe, was Sooyoung. Vivi's heart ached, but she learned that she hadn't felt the worst of the pain yet when her gaze settled on a brown-haired girl next to Sooyoung. The girl was cute, Vivi couldn't deny that, with her red dress and bright smile. But the confirmation that Sooyoung had moved on and completely forgotten about Vivi also hurt and stopped her in her tracks. 

Eventually Sooyoung seemed to feel Vivi's gaze focused on her and her new girlfriend (?) and turned to face Vivi. Her eyes widened a little in shock as she froze. The other girl noticed the expression of Sooyoung's face and followed her gaze, frowning a bit when she spotted Vivi. She started to ask Sooyoung something, probably asking who Vivi was, but Vivi didn't care anymore. Sooyoung had obviously moved on, and she hoped that Sooyoung wouldn't drag this girl along as she had Vivi. So with her head as high as she could with the tears welling up in her eyes and Sooyoung's stare still focused on her, Vivi kept on walking home. 

Vivi smiles at the memory of the last time she had seen Sooyoung, a wry and bittersweet smile. It's now the beginning of January, a week after she had seen Sooyoung with the cute girl and four months after Sooyoung swept her off her feet. Vivi looks at the lapping waves, coming in and out, in and out, and is reminded once again of her relationship with Sooyoung. 

A song breaks into her thoughts about Sooyoung.

🌊

The glow drops down as the brokenhearted human follows Haseul's voice. For the first time in a while, Haseul feels a surge of excitement. In mere minutes, she will be human again, and she can try again with life like she was promised. 

Haseul's voice grows louder with her newfound energy. In the distance, she sees the vague form of a human swimming closer with pink hair haloed around her head in the water. A glowing blue heart bright with promise. 

Yes, soon she will be human. 

🌊

The song is like nothing Vivi has ever heard before, bitter and angry yet sweet and alluring. She feels like she should be running in the other direction, but finds herself walking into the ocean instead. It's cold, the winter water. The song feels warm and safe, as safe as a lion's den. 

The closer she gets, the more desperate she is to get closer. Her movements become more frantic, needing to get into the ocean to find the singer. What if the singer is drowning? After all, who sings in the middle of the ocean?

When she cannot find the singer, Vivi dives into the water. 

🌊

The human is inches away from Haseul now, and she can't stop admiring her beauty, with her small nose and delicate eyelashes. For the first time, Haseul hesitates about transferring the curse. She wants to kiss this girl, but not for the reason she once did. 

And Haseul lets herself imagine how she would have met this girl in another life, one where she isn't a siren and could kiss a pretty girl not to transfer a curse, but just for the sake of kissing her. She could take her out on those things, what do humans call them? Dates? Yeah, she could take this girl out on a date in another life. She lets herself imagine this girl's personality, her laugh, her likes and dislikes. She wants to know what this girl looks like in the morning sun and in the glow of the moonlight and every hour in between. 

Haseul doesn't know what that life would be like. It's been so long since she's been human that she can't imagine how that life would feel. But if she kisses her, she will know. Besides, there will be other humans that she can do all of these things with soon. She buries down her guilt and leans forward, pressing her lips against the other's. If only this was in better circumstances, Haseul wonders once again. 

Her hand slips away from the other girl's hair and the two drift apart. As she swims back up towards the surface, she glances down to see a pair of legs on her, and a tail on the other. She turns away, focusing on reaching the surface. Haseul sends a silent message to the pink-haired girl. She thinks it's a thank you, but it feels like an apology as well. 

🌊

In her dazed state, Vivi thinks that the woman approaching her is beautiful. Her face delicate and soft, long dark hair swirling around her. And this woman's voice, _damn,_ she can sing.

Vivi also vaguely notices a green tail, but when she tries to make sense of this, she decides it's easier to just focus on her voice instead. Her voice that's whispering secrets just for her, pulling her closer with a promise of a new life. A new life, one without the pain of being pushed away by Sooyoung and without the sharp loneliness that followed. Vivi's heart aches, she knows she doesn't want to forget Sooyoung, not when she loved her. But this woman─mermaid?─is so appealing with her promise, that Vivi agrees.

The last thing she remembers before the sea goes black is thinking that this woman truly is beautiful as she leans closer to Vivi, and that she hopes Sooyoung is doing alright. 

🌊

Haseul wakes on the shore, disoriented and unsure of how she got there. Then it all comes rushing back, what happened and who she is now. 

She staggers a bit as she stands, not used to the feeling of legs holding up her body anymore. She thinks that this should feel familiar, like she's been through this instability before. It's not familiar. Haseul is completely new to being human again. 

Her main focus right now is getting back into society, and the first step is to get off this beach and find a place to live. It's late at night, so there shouldn't be too many people walking around. Haseul is grateful that there's nobody to watch her, but a part of her feels inconvenienced by this. Especially when she realizes that her tail must have replaced whatever she was wearing when she became a siren, and she is now in desperate need of a change of clothes. 

She looks around the beach before she sees a blonde woman walking who appears to be about Haseul's age. She calls out for help, relieved when the other's head turns in her direction. 

The woman, thankfully, doesn't look at Haseul like she's crazy, but instead goes to get her a change of clothes from her nearby apartment. After Haseul has changed into the new shirt and jeans, she thanks the woman and walks away, completely missing the thoughtful look the woman is giving her. 

For the next few days, Haseul looks around town and eventually finds a job at a nearby restaurant. A coworker there, a sweet girl a couple years younger by the name of Heejin, offers Haseul to stay at her apartment while she gets back on her feet. Haseul accepts the offer and finds that Heejin is fun to live with, chaotic yet organized. Haseul has adjusted to the younger's small habits: rabbit plushies everywhere, rushing to get ready for work and classes when she wakes up late, and playing guitar at random hours of the night. At first they annoyed Haseul, but now she just lightheartedly teases the younger girl about her habits that secretly make Haseul feel at home. 

During the day, Haseul works. In the evening, she goes on walks around town to become familiar with the area. She takes the free time to think about what she wants to do with her new life. Maybe she'll go to university and work at an elementary school. After all, living with Heejin feels like taking care of a child sometimes, so maybe she'll be good at it. 

On one of her days off work, Haseul wanders into a building with white pins and a ball rolling towards them, the sign reading Butterfly Effect. She's immediately greeted by a wave of warm air, a reprieve from the biting cold outside. After a few moments of studying the other people in the building, she makes a vague guess of what she's supposed to be doing here and walks over to the desk with a girl behind it handing out shoes. So this is the downside of becoming human again: relearning life. 

Haseul walks over to the counter and is met with a bright smile from the girl working. Her name tag reads _Yerim_ with a smiling sticker next to it. Haseul doesn't know her, but she feels like this sticker might suit Yerim very well. The girl chats with Haseul the entire time she's assisting her, and Haseul can't help but smile at her bright and happy demeanor. She wonders if Heejin would get along with her, and makes a mental note to talk to the younger girl when she gets home. 

Haseul takes the shoes over to one of the lanes and changes into them. She tries playing for a while (she's not the best, her posture feels weird) before her attention drifts back over to the counter. There's now another girl there, one that looks slightly older and taller than the employee. 

"Are you sure you haven't seen her, Yerim?" Haseul overhears the tall girl ask. Haseul freezes. Her bowling lane is forgotten now that she's fully invested in listening in on their conversation.

"I'm sure, Sooyoung. She hasn't been answering my texts or calls either, but this is Vivi we're talking about. She'll be back soon enough. she probably just needed some time to herself to think about… things."

The taller girl─Sooyoung─ doesn't look convinced, but nods in agreement. Yerim smiles reassuringly, reaching over the counter to pat Sooyoung's shoulder. Haseul wonders if she was still a siren, would she see a pair of broken hearts? She returns to her lane, no longer interested in their problems. She hopes they hear back from this Vivi soon, and tries not to think about the disappearance of a girl from this area around the same time she became a human again. 

Haseul leaves the building shortly after, unable to be in the same area as these two girls upset over the disappearance of a loved one. 

The entire way back to the apartment, Haseul thinks about that human─no, siren─with the pretty face and pink hair. How is her family dealing with her disappearance? Haseul frowns, uneasy at the thought of others being upset by that girl's disappearance forever. Haseul can feel herself becoming more human every day, marked by the sympathy felt walking down the street and seeing humans─other humans, not just targets of the curse─deal with bad days. Walking around town and seeing no broken hearts in a sea of humans is unnerving, something Haseul isn't used to yet. But the most unsettling thing? The fact that Haseul feels a pain in her chest at the idea of the pretty girl's permanent disappearance from the world. 

🌊

Jinsol watches the dark-haired girl walk away. She never gave her name, but Jinsol feels like she should know her. Maybe a few years back, some long forgotten friend or classmate. Whoever she is, she didn't seem to recognize Jinsol, so maybe Jinsol is just imagining things. 

She'll ask Jungeun about her, maybe she'll remember. 

🌊

Vivi opens her eyes, staring into the dark depths of the ocean. She feels a brief panic. _I can't breathe,_ Vivi thinks, before remembering that she doesn't need to gasp for air and fight her way to the surface. What she needs, she's not entirely sure. But it seems like finding a broken heart is pretty high on the list if Vivi wants to return to a life, to really living. Little by little, she learns to navigate the ocean. She stays away from the other sirens, not that they're any threat to her. Vivi just knows that they aren't meant to be around each other, not meant to be human.

Human, to be human. What she wouldn't give to be human again, with memories. But Vivi thinks that whatever made her choose to become a siren might be worth forgetting forever. So instead, she wanders the ocean without caring about her old memories. Finding a broken heart is more important. 

Sometimes, Vivi sees something. She isn't entirely sure who it is or why she remembers them. But when Vivi closes her eyes to take a break from the endless drifting, drifting through the water, she sees a face. Delicate yet defined, beautiful all the same and framed by dark hair. She sees lips coming closer, unsmiling and serious despite their beauty, not a lover or a happy moment. Was this the person who broke her heart? Or the siren who lured Vivi into this curse, this trap? The siren who spoke of secrets and starting over, a promise for love.

Vivi looks up to the surface of the ocean. there's a blue glow, waiting for her to kiss its pain away. Vivi smiles, no idea how long she was a siren before luck came her way. But she plans to take advantage of it.

_O broken hearted one, your soul has grown weary…_

**Author's Note:**

> me: this is the first k-pop fic I've written  
> my several unfinished k-pop fics in my google drive: 👁 👄 👁 
> 
> Thank you for reading! This was an impromptu fic that nobody (not even my closest friend/usual beta reader) knew that I was writing until I had written it. I hope you enjoyed and have a great day ♡


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